To run or not to run?

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There are certain events that are normal in the Keys, like running seven miles across a bridge on a hot April morning. Obviously, it seemed like a good idea at the time and then it kind of stuck — just like the lionfish population. For runners, this can be a really big deal, and for others, heh, they’ll find out what happened later, after sleeping in and brunch. Regardless, each year residents face the conundrum: run or not to run?

Reasons to DO 7 Mile Bridge run

  • The copious amount of selfies taken before and after that you get to post immediately on social media.
  • The really cool compression socks you get to wear.
  • Forever, for the rest of your life, whenever you cross the bridge, you can say, “You know, I ran across this bridge.” Cue eye roll.
  • Got a big case of the “Self Right-chies” when someone commented that yoga was better than running.
  • Even your therapist thought you wouldn’t do it.
  • For the beginning “bounce” when the herd of people crossing the first expansion joint makes the bridge jump. Better than a trampoline.
  • For the free beer.
  • To beat the snot out of your sister’s time.

Reasons NOT TO DO the 7 Mile Bridge run

  • You own a car.
  • You can’t make fun of Facebook posts unless you are home looking at Facebook posts.
  • C’mon, admit it, you can’t beat the bus.
  • Your favorite bartender Andy talked you out of it with Ketel One.
  • Your therapist offered to do it with you.
  • No place to do hill (hump) training.
  • Lack of a good group costume idea.
  • This may be the year your sister beats your time.
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Hays Blinckmann
Hays Blinckmann is an oil painter, author of the novel “In The Salt,” lover of all things German including husband, children and Bundesliga. She spends her free time developing a font for sarcasm, testing foreign wines and failing miserably at home cooking.

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