HUMOR: TOP 10 SIGNS IT’S SEPTEMBER IN THE FLORIDA KEYS

For locals in the Florida Keys, September’s “off season” doesn’t mean what it once did, as crowds continue to fill the Florida Keys. But there is still a slight change  of “season” here in our island chain. We bring you…

Top 10 Signs It’s September in the Florida Keys 

10. The Jumping Bridge is a “secret” once again. 

9.  Your favorite restaurant suddenly remembers your name and drink order. 

8.  You can travel from one side of Islamorada to the other without the ice melting in your mojito.

7.  It’s boat month, as in the one month you have time to enjoy your boat. 

6. You get to combat the highest taxes, highest insurance rates and highest cost of living in the nation — by availing yourself of a “local’s special” buy-one-get-one-half-off appetizer at select restaurants. 

5. You get to look forward to all of the cool October events coming up. Wait a minute … scratch that. 

4. It’s the one month you give two shits about the weather.

3. It’s a reminder that you have 60 days before your jackass neighbors come back for the winter and start telling you how much better the Keys would be if they were more like the place they just left. 

2. You finally have time to schedule those doctor appointments you’ve put off for the knee, shoulder and heart pains you’ve been experiencing since February. 

  1. Every time a rain cloud forms over Africa, you get a sudden urge to run out and buy batteries and bottled water.