Far be it from us to let the “Barbie” movie bandwagon pass without comment, especially given the blockbuster’s recently revealed relevance to the Florida Keys.
That’s right. Our tiny island chain made national news recently — for something other than the hot water that’s killing our coral reef.
Amid harrowing agony in Hawaii, the political turmoil of a former president’s fourth indictment and the apparent, pork-flipping importance of the Iowa State Fair, the Florida Keys emerged, however briefly, as a pink-tinged distraction from disturbing headlines.
In case you missed it (or in case you have better things to do than scroll through the internet’s political rabbit hole such as myself), Neil deGrasse Tyson, the noted astrophysicist and author, revealed Aug. 9 on Twitter that his astronomical expertise places Barbie Land “somewhere in the Florida Keys.” (I refuse to use the social media platform’s meaningless new name, X, until Elon Musk challenges me to a cage fight.)
Talk about cultural significance. We have arrived.
And the famous scientist’s big reveal wasn’t the only referfence to the Keys and the Mattel toy. In a passing reference during the film, the CEO of Mattel (played by Will Ferrell) mentions Barbie’s younger sister, Skipper, saying the younger toy doll, on a prior misadventure, had managed to get into a family’s home in Key West, and try to teach the family’s toddler how to surf in her capacity as “babysitter.”
We can ignore the exhausting misconception by millions of people that Key West has surfable waves, or any waves for that matter, and instead simply appreciate our “product placement” in one of the country’s most successful movies ever. My friend and colleague, Shasta Munnerlyn, said the entire Key West audience cheered at the mention of Key West while she was watching the movie. “It was actually a really cool moment in the theater,” she said.
But back to Neil deGrasse Tyson. Key West Mayor Teri Johnston, when asked about Tyson’s pseudo-scientific discovery, told the Miami Herald, “I think that’s terrific. It’s just such a wonderful time to have something quirky and positive and, you know, so energetic out in the world today. Well, we’ve got one of everything else. Why not Barbie?”
Alas, Twitter users, as they do, promptly twisted the pink patina of plastic positivity into their usual pall of political negativity and personal attacks on a scientist who was trying to have a bit of fun.
What would the world do without realists like @TheAaronBowley, who helpfully educated the astrophysicist with this keen insight: “Actually the extremely low gravity would put them on a completely different planet. also the fact that humans are not toy dolls, this does not exist on earth, they are an alien race.”
Other users pointed out that the movie landscape depicts mountains.
And then came the politics:
Charles Carmichael @ChuckCarmike07 wrote, “How was Barbie able to create this paradise in Florida?! I thought that Ron DeSanctimonious had turned Florida into a fascist hellhole?! No way that a feminist utopia could exist anywhere except the liberal paradises of California or New York.”
Alex Cole @acnewsitics wrote, “DeSantis isn’t going to like this,” and Ashlee Highfill, M.Ed. @Dogmom1632 added, “Barbie’s world can’t be in Florida. Florida has traveled back to the 1800’s with these nonsense laws.”
But let’s end this nonsense on a positively pink note, as Jolene Olsteen @JoleneOlsteen did, writing, “Long live the Conch Republic!”
Thank you, Jolene — and thanks, Neil deGrasse Tyson, for once again putting us on the map, imaginary or not.
