“Remember, you’re not ugly. Just poor.”
During the depths of the pandemic, I started to see this phrase again and again on my Instagram feed, displayed on memes with before-and-after photos of famous (and very, very rich) models/influencers/athletes/actors. Pics of everyone from Kylie Jenner to Tom Brady showed astonishing makeovers, clearly after numerous cosmetic procedures, surgeries and sessions with a highly paid glam squad.
Like many, I fall into the trap of comparing myself to, say, the achingly gorgeous model (and child of wealthy parents) Bella Hadid when I’m not feeling my best. And during these difficult economic times, when I have to stretch out visits to the salon and watch my gray roots grow in, it can be demoralizing to see influencers flaunt their swoon-worthy selves on the daily.
First things first: a gratitude check. I have my health, I have shelter and food, and I have people who love me. But I do have my dignity — feeling confident in how I look does raise my self-esteem and give me that boost to go on a first date or even a job interview.
Does having less money make us “ugly”? Of course not. But I know I’m not alone here: I can’t afford the myriad treatments that it may take to morph into a self-assured red-carpet-ready knockout (for me, J.Lo will always be a goddess).
Here is just a partial list I’ve read are regularly done by the rich and beautiful: surgeries for fat removal, tummy tucks, breast implants/reductions and sculpting the nose, eyes, chin, ears and face; teeth caps, straightening and whitening; laser treatments for hair removal; “intimate bleaching”; countless hair services, from plugs and weaves and straightening to basic cuts and color; eyelash extensions; microblading for eyebrows; tattooed makeup; regular glam sessions for hair and makeup; spray-tanning … and on and on.
Yikes, I get overwhelmed just thinking of this. So I asked beauty experts and Florida Keys friends (who are all beautiful, from the inside out) what they recommend doing for the maximum positive impact on our appearance with minimum damage to our bank accounts — and with no need to ruin our credit for plastic surgery.
Writer Meirav Devash has covered the beauty industry for outlets such as Vogue, Allure, Oprah Daily, The New York Times and many others, and she has seen countless trends come and go over the years. She advised me to carefully choose only the beauty procedures that help me feel the most confident, as opposed to throwing money at every last trend.
“Some high-maintenance beauty treatments are expensive up front, but may help you save time (and sometimes money) in the end,” she told me. “If you tweezed off all your eyebrows in high school and you’re spending 15 minutes every morning drawing them on from scratch in a panic, getting them microbladed (and being able to roll out of bed with eyebrows on) might be worth saving up for.”
Good point. I love carefully groomed eyebrows, and I have spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on eyebrow tinting and waxing over the years. However, at one Florida Keys salon, a single microblading treatment costs around $300 — and lasts much, much longer than waxing.
Another tip popped up over and over again in my interviews: Take care of your skin.
“The best advice for people of every budget is to wear a moisturizer with SPF 30+ during the day to protect your skin from cumulative sun damage, and use a retinol at night to speed up your cell turnover,” said Devash. “Drug-store brands with these ingredients are just as effective as high-end ones. Good skin and a red lipstick never go out of style.”
Gilda Rroshi, skin-care specialist and co-founder of Islamorada’s Ciao Bella Salon, agreed, saying that retinol plus Vitamin C serums “are my superpower and fountain of youth.”
“You can wear the best, most expensive dress, but if your skin is falling apart, you won’t feel confident,” Rroshi said.
While some women get facials every month, Rroshi said that if you visit the right specialist once, they can set you up with the right products that — if you commit to using them daily, like brushing your teeth — can give you a glow like J.Lo’s.
I have a friend who is a gorgeous woman in her 60s, and she told me that if she had to choose just one of her regular beauty treatments — they run the gamut from mani-pedis to cheek fillers to blowouts — she would not part with her daily skin products.
“The difference in my face in the last 10 years of using products recommended by my facialist has been remarkable,” she told me.
Keys resident Stephanie Blacksmith, a longtime beauty industry employee, said that she has found another fountain of youth: her hair. Over all other services, getting the roots touched up for her long, caramel-colored locks is her number-one priority.
“How my hair looks right now is how I will look when they put me in the incinerator at 103 years old,” she said, emphatically. (Folks, we don’t think she’s joking.)
She pointed out that while it’s difficult to prevent our skin from aging, we do have control over our hair, which can still look youthful as we get older.
“Find a style that looks good and stick with it,” she said, citing the long, shiny honey-brown mane of Lisa Vanderpump as an example.
I have another Keys friend, in her 50s, who told me she would not give up coloring her roots either.
“But Botox is a close second,” she confessed. “I get Botox every four months. When I can. It makes a huge difference.”
According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, Botox costs around $15 per unit. To treat a lined forehead, for example, 40 units might be used, so the total price would be around $600 — which you can break down into a not-so-scary-sounding $150 a month, if you get treated every four months, like my friend.
So, in short: To look fabulous, my experts suggested we invest wisely in well-chosen treatments; take good daily care of our skin (and the products can be from the drug store); be vigilant about covering our roots; wear red lipstick; and mayyyybeeee use a little Botox.
But perhaps actor and L’Oréal spokesperson Viola Davis knows best. She recently revealed to People magazine that feeling beautiful is simply about loving ourselves.
“It’s not just spa treatments and a glass of wine,” Davis said. “It’s in showing up when someone hurts you. Creating boundaries, and when someone crosses it, show up for yourself. No one ever taught me that. I felt loving myself was being conceited. No, that’s right.”
