Yes, we locals do have our secrets in the Florida Keys. It’s hard to get us to admit them but give us a free beer or hug and we usually cave like Wikileaks on CNN. Here’s just a taste of our vaulted goodies…
- White work trucks do not go above 18 miles per hour.
- Turn signals are disabled from local auto dealers.
- UPS drivers are actually Code Enforcement spies.
- Resident Parking is a myth.
- You can only run for mayor if Mark Rossi double dog dares you.
- There will be genetically modified iguanas released in 2018; they will be larger, so TDC can market The Florida Keys: Jurassic Park
- Aaron Sorkin and Shonda Rhimes both want to base a TV character on Holly Raschein.
- We actually do have more than one sunset, but don’t tell anybody.
- We know Conch shells look like lady parts but can’t admit it.
- The Weekly is actually owned by The Onion.
