If I’m being honest, I totally forgot a few weeks ago was the Super Bowl. You ask, how could you forget when everywhere you looked, they were promoting it like it was a Y2K-level event?
Truth be told, my team, the Buffalo Bills, wasn’t playing, so I didn’t care to watch the game. But I did want to see what Bad Bunny was going to do. Whether you’re Team Bad Bunny or not, you now know who he is on some level. I eventually caught the halftime show on a streaming service, and one line kept echoing long after it was over: “The only thing stronger than hate is love.”
The human side of me thought, “that’s a powerful statement.” The scientist in me thought, “Is that true? Can one emotion actually be stronger than another?”
The short answer is yes, but if you know me, I cannot stop with the short answer. What I found in the research world is … astounding. Consider this my brief meta-analysis, minus the lab coat, in hopes it gives you pause.
Hate or anger, hostility or resentment feels strong because it is biologically “loud.” When we perceive a threat, the amygdala activates almost instantly. It triggers the stress response: Adrenaline rises, cortisol floods the system, heart rate increases and muscles tense. This is your fight-or-flight wiring. It’s fast. It’s primal. It’s protective.
And here’s the catch: Your brain does not distinguish well between a physical threat and a social one. An unfriendly comment. A political post. A news headline. A slight at work.
To your nervous system, a threat is a threat. That’s why hate feels powerful. It hijacks your physiology. It narrows your thinking. It prepares you to defend. From an evolutionary standpoint, that response kept us alive. But chronic activation? That slowly wears us down.
Now, let’s talk about love. Love, defined broadly as connection, compassion, belonging or care, activates an entirely different biochemical cascade. Connection stimulates oxytocin, often called the “bonding hormone.” It enhances trust and lowers stress reactivity. Dopamine, associated with reward and motivation, increases. Serotonin pathways stabilize mood. Cortisol levels decrease.
Studies consistently show that strong social bonds are associated with lower inflammation, better immune function, improved cardiovascular health and increased longevity.
And this isn’t limited to romantic love. Relationships with friends, family, pets and community produce similar protective effects. Love doesn’t spike like hate does. It regulates. It restores. It builds resilience. And resilience, biologically speaking, is strength.
So, which is stronger? If we measure strength by intensity in the moment, hate may appear stronger. It’s louder, faster, more explosive. But if we measure strength by long-term impact on the body, brain and overall survival? Love wins, every time. Hate keeps the body in defense mode. Love moves the body into repair mode. Hate narrows perception. Love broadens cognition and problem-solving. Hate consumes energy. Love replenishes it. One burns hot and fast. The other sustains.
Here’s the part that fascinates me most: Hate is reactive. It’s subcortical. It’s automatic. Love, especially when chosen intentionally, engages the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for regulation, empathy, perspective-taking, and executive function. It takes more neurological sophistication to choose compassion over retaliation.
That pause before responding (because how you respond is, in fact, a choice) – that’s higher-order brain function. That’s strength. In a cultural climate where outrage travels faster than reason, choosing love is not weakness. It’s regulation. It’s discipline. It’s physiological maturity. Bad Bunny may have said it in one sentence. Neuroscience appears to agree with him.
It’s not just about living longer. It’s about living better.
