Have you called your favorite airline lately? If so, you likely heard something like, “Due to heavy call volume, wait times are currently longer than normal. Rather than wait on hold, we can call you back in the order you called. Your current wait time is … nine hours.”
We can’t make this stuff up. Even after a busy holiday travel weekend, this is still the current recording that most airlines are happy to offer. But do not fret. Always here to help (and offer some hands-on experience) the Keys Weekly has a solution to your wait time woes. Here are…
The Top 10 Things You Can Do While Waiting For Airline Customer Service to Call Back
10. Complete that 50,000-piece puzzle of the Sistine Chapel that your jackass neighbor regifted you last Christmas.
9. Watch a Judd Apatow film in almost all of its entirety.
7. Tell your wife you’ll need a quiet place to wait on hold for the next eight hours as you relocate to Shanna Key.
6. Post your disapproval on social media while tagging an airline who could give two shits.
5. Rewatch the last two seasons of GOT and when someone from the airline finally calls back, insist they refer to you as “Lord of the North” as you demand an upgrade to Comfort Plus.
4. Call your mother back.
3. Create a podcast series and title it, “I would rather eat burnt hair than try to reach customer service at an airline right now.”
2. Learn a foreign language, so you can leave a hateful review in both English and Mandarin.
1. Binge-read an archive of your local weekly paper’s incredibly stupid Top 10s.