Barstool Astrology

Astrology Column

Elementally, metal is a conductor, transferring electricity and carrying heat. How does this translate in 2020? This year is about imagination and industry, the time is nigh to begin creative endeavors. In terms of guiding animal energy, rats are industrious, clever and prolific. They take care of their own, tending to the sick and injured in their pack. Prone to depression and nervousness, isolation is devastating to rats, see Templeton, the tritagonist of “Charlotte’s Web.” Rats require the bolstering company of others. In kind, 2020 is a time for collaboration and companionship. Run with the pack, so to speak. 

The danger of all this needful togetherness in the Rat year is that it can lead to feelings of jealousy and possessiveness. Keep in mind, as we move through these next months that nothing truly belongs to anyone and we should leave room at the proverbial table, or in the metaphorical sewer, for everyone. 

March 21 – April 19

It takes a baptism by fire to birth an Aries anew. The good news is, the trying flames have subsided, dear Ram, and you have nothing but a sanctified, albeit lightly singed, path ahead of you. Walk on. 

Notable Aries: Steven Seagal / April 10, 1952  

April 20 – May 20

Fellow bull Grace Jones maintains, “Survival is my primary instinct. It’s out of my control. It’s an outside force, a voice that says, ‘Do this for your life or it will devour you.'” Not everything is a matter of life and death of course, but I urge you to discern what has the potential to swallow you whole and kick that fucker square in its greedy teeth. 

Notable Taurus: James Brown / May 3, 1933    

May 21 – June 20 

Falling in love, as a sage Gemini once told me, is a misnomer. If we’re doing it right, we should be rising in love, an elevation of spirit and self. If you’re feeling more bogged down than raised up, consider more carefully where you’re casting your affections.  

Notable Gemini: Allen Ginsberg/ June 3, 1926

June 21- July 22

As we crest the wave towards Aquarius season, you are experiencing a kind of emotional molting. What was once comfortable now feels constricting and the sure thing is coming up short as you are being called to personal progress. You may find yourself craving the company and influence of radicals, free thinkers and rambling men. Open mind, open heart, open door. 

Notable Cancer: Cat Stevens / July 21, 1948

July 23 to August 22

Fellow Leo and celebrated rabble-rouser Charles Bukowski once said, “I never met another man I’d rather be. And even if that’s a delusion, it’s a lucky one.” I hope you feel a similar preference for yourself in the weeks ahead, lion. No matter where or what you are, you are a wonderful thing to be. 

Notable Leo: Nipsey Hussle / August 15, 1985

August 23 to September 22

A favorite Virg-bro of mine, when discussing his ex-girlfriend’s new relationship announced coolly, “He can have that hell.” I wonder, Virgo, what pain you could spare yourself by adopting a similar strategy of relieved release. 

Notable Virgo: Keith Moon / August 23, 1946

September 23 to October 22

“Wild” author and advice columnist Cheryl Strayed writes, “Acceptance is a small, quiet room.” To get there, Libra, you have to shut up and be willing to go it alone. 

Notable Libra: Todd Snider / October 11, 1966

October 23 to November 21

The path to forgiveness is not paved with apologies. It is constant road construction, the traffic cones and potholes of our attempts to amend our failures. Save your sorry and get to work on driving more thoughtfully and preventing future accidents. 

Notable Scorpio: Sylvia Plath / October 27, 1932

November 22 to December 21

The final two weeks of the month may find you irritable and unable to communicate clearly. Your brain is begging for a break. Restrict (not one of your favorite words) the amount of time you spend interacting with screens and strangers. Tune it all out so you might tune into your own higher frequency.  

Notable Sagittarius: Billy Idol / November 30, 1955

December 22 to January 19

The theme for sea goats in 2020 is emancipation. First item on the agenda: Free yourself from your own negative thought patterns. By expecting the worst, you invent and invite it. Enough of that. Try in the days ahead to conjure only positive possibilities and wildly optimistic outcomes. 

Notable Capricorn: Janis Joplin / January 18, 1943

January 20 to February 18

You are the zodiac sign most likely to dispense unsolicited advice. While at least 14% of your advisements are apt, I encourage you to save your sermons in the weeks ahead. Let the ones you love win wisdom through their own faltering. 

Notable Aquarius: Galileo / February 15, 1564

February 19 to March 20

The hierarchy of your inner circle is shifting, and a culling is called for. Those that don’t support, challenge and accept you will be ousted. This vacancy in your proverbial dance card will make space for fresh acquaintances to become fast friends.

Notable Pisces: Elizabeth Taylor / February 27, 1932


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REDA WIGLE is a middle child and Taurus Fire Tiger named after a stigmatic saint. She divides her time and affections between New Orleans and Key West.