Tons of visitors flock to the Keys to celebrate Fourth of July in the islands. We got all the good stuff — fireworks, hot dogs — but with a fantastic backdrop of palm trees and beautiful, blue water. Did we mention it’s unique?
Top 10 things we love/hate about July 4th
- Love the fire works. Hate peeling the dog off the ceiling.
- Love red, white and blue sprinkles on Rice Krispie treats. Hate those jerks who try to pass off banana, blueberry and strawberry skewers as dessert.
- Love celebrating birth of our nation. Hate the 15-second video clips of fireworks on Facebook. I already “seent” it.
- Love celebrating with my friends at the beach. Hate those same jerks who won’t let me into traffic as we all leave en masse. (We were besties five seconds ago, Karen.)
- Love Ol’ Glory. Hate our flag on bikinis, lobster bibs and dildos. (Google it, patriots.)
- Hate the scary UFO mothership from “Independence Day.” Love, love Russell Casse, the crazy-ass crop duster.
- Love the Fourth bikini weather in the Florida Keys. Surprised by the one guy who always thinks even a Speedo is too much, and wanders around drunk and naked.
- Love the magic and awe of rockets bursting in air. Hate holding two fingers in my other hand while in line at local emergency room.
- Love those hog dogs! Hate those hot dogs!
- Love coming together to celebrate. Hate overindulgent keg stands, bong rips, political rants, swings and misses, being carried and taxi drivers’ attitude.