There are certain events that are normal in the Keys, like running seven miles across a bridge on a hot April morning. Obviously, it seemed like a good idea at the time and then it kind of stuck — just like the lionfish population. For runners, this can be a really big deal, and for others, heh, they’ll find out what happened later, after sleeping in and brunch. Regardless, each year residents face the conundrum: run or not to run?
Reasons to DO 7 Mile Bridge run
- The copious amount of selfies taken before and after that you get to post immediately on social media.
- The really cool compression socks you get to wear.
- Forever, for the rest of your life, whenever you cross the bridge, you can say, “You know, I ran across this bridge.” Cue eye roll.
- Got a big case of the “Self Right-chies” when someone commented that yoga was better than running.
- Even your therapist thought you wouldn’t do it.
- For the beginning “bounce” when the herd of people crossing the first expansion joint makes the bridge jump. Better than a trampoline.
- For the free beer.
- To beat the snot out of your sister’s time.
Reasons NOT TO DO the 7 Mile Bridge run
- You own a car.
- You can’t make fun of Facebook posts unless you are home looking at Facebook posts.
- C’mon, admit it, you can’t beat the bus.
- Your favorite bartender Andy talked you out of it with Ketel One.
- Your therapist offered to do it with you.
- No place to do hill (hump) training.
- Lack of a good group costume idea.
- This may be the year your sister beats your time.
