Top 10 Tech Terms Interpretations

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Top Ten Cartoon
“But Mom, now I am a stable genius.”

There are so many new and different techie terms for cyber living, even Julian Assange can’t keep up, let alone @realDonaldTrump. The cyber world is fun to visit but let’s just keep it real, folks, and keep it in the Keys. So when you hear these words or terms, think about them from a sunset-loving, margarita-drinking, breezy, 80-degree attitude.

  1. Devil’s Ivy

Real World: Cyber security vulnerability, an attack that can spread.

Our World: Bougainvillea, first line of defense against home invasion; a barbed, pretty plant that can spread.

  1. Graymail

Real World: Email you opted to receive, but don’t really want.

Our World: Gossip you thought you wanted to know, then realized you didn’t.

  1. Hacktivism

Real World: Breaking into a computer system, for a political or social justice purpose.

Our World: Saving, or chopping up, a tree or mangrove for a purpose; either way.

  1. Smart Home

Real World: A residence with appliances, lighting, audio and visual entertainment, and security capable of communicating with one another and controlled remotely.

Our World: A completely hurricane proof home.

  1. Twitterers

Real World: Users who post and interact with on the social media platform Twitter.

Our World: Anyone who anonymously writes to the media.

  1. Clickbait

Real World: Online content whose main purpose is to attract attention and encourage visitors to click on a link to a particular web page.

Our World: Advertisements for “2-for-1” Happy Hour specials.

  1. Troll:

Real world: A person who sows discord on the internet by starting quarrels or posting inflammatory messages online with the intent of provoking readers into response.

Our world: Neighbor who calls code enforcement.

  1. Ghosting

Real World: Ending a personal relationship with someone by withdrawing from all communication suddenly and without explanation.

Our World: Actually going on a ghost tour, freaking people out with Robert the Doll or being lame and wearing a sheet at Fantasy Fest.

  1. Web

Real World: An international system of connected internet servers.

Our World: That spider-created device made by the strange crab like arachnid that, every spring, makes a face catcher right outside your front door.

  1. Customer Lifecycle:

Real World: The various stages a prospective or existing customer progresses through in a company’s marketing and sales funnel.

Our World: Doesn’t matter, we will keep going back to any store no matter how bad the customer service or lack of retail; meh, it’s all we got.

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