Top 10 ways to blow your stimulus (or county overtime) money during a pandemic:

10. Used Jet Skis.

9. Imported exotic animals.

8. National Rifle Association Lifetime Membership.

7. Settle outstanding parking tickets.

6. Open a new account at

5. Stock your carport with White Claw variety packs.

4. Start an online MBA program.

3. New dancing shoes.

2. Sponsor a kid in Ethiopia.

1. Miami Dolphins season tickets.

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