- If you must kill a zombie, kill it with kindness. The irony will make it easier for everyone.
- Sexy zombies drink free!
- Learn the difference between a zombie and someone that just got their medical marijuana card.
- Zombie apocalypse dream team: a big bottle of Purell and your uncle in the NRA.
- Note: Emotional support animals will be eaten and reanimated first in order to provide support for loss of emotional support animal.
- You only have to be faster then your “friend” — choose slow ones. Or ones with weaker livers.
- When approached by a zombie, try to find common ideas and experiences that will open dialogue and facilitate mutual understanding.
- Befriend Greg Sullivan immediately and get protection from Waste Management.
- Remember: zombies are afraid of fire and cruise ship passengers waving coupons.
- Everybody meet in Key West—The Cow Key Channel Bridge is up for demolition anyway!
