TOP 10 LESSONS LEARNED DURING COVID

On Dec. 31, our friends at We’ve Got the Keys will present “Illuminate Key West,” asking everyone to step out at midnight and shine a light into the sky. 

Florida Keys Media (our radio buddies at US1 Radio and their other four stations) will be broadcasting live to bring the Keys community together. During that show, our very own Top 10 from this week will be presented (with some possible radio edits to the dirty words), but you can read them all in advance right here. 

Thanks, everyone, for humoring us as we attempt to humor you. Our New Year’s Resolution is to continue bringing you cheesy and outlandish Top 10s throughout 2021.

Top 10 Things We Learned During the Year of COVID 

10. People are generally unhappy with systemic racism — unless they’re racist.

9. Watching tennis without spectators is actually more boring than watching tennis with spectators.

8. Every guy who couldn’t spell “cat” in high school is suddenly a doctor or attorney on social media.

7. Jeffery Toobin taught all of us the importance of double-checking the “camera off” feature on Zoom calls.

6. Everyone hates socialism. Except when the government starts sending out stimulus checks.

5. We finally found a foolproof way to properly identify assholes. Just go back and document every idiot on Facebook arguing about wearing a mask.

4. We always said we would learn a new language, finish writing a novel or learn a musical instrument if we just had more time at home. Now we know that was all bullshit.

3. Just when we thought air travel couldn’t get any worse… 

2.  It was all fun and games until we ran out of toilet paper.

1.  Learning Common Core math at home with your children is the equivalent of a root canal without novocaine.