The Upper Keys Rotary Club’s Gigantic Nautical Flea Market snarled traffic for miles this past weekend as residents from across the Keys and South Florida converged on Founders Park to find sweet deals on everything from dock lines and fishing rods to golf carts, bloody marys, and T-shirts. The 250-plus vendors displayed a dazzling array of goods, except for a few minor items. We at the Weekly are revealing…
Top Ten Things NOT found at the Gigantic Nautical Flea Market
10) Bootleg copies of Dave Feder’s“Black Emerald” album.
9) A convenient parking spot.
8) Louis Vuitton handbags.
6) Cardigans or other garb coveted by liberal hipsters.
4) Hot Cocoa.
3) Star Wars action figures.
2)An Armani suit.
1)Terry Abel’s dignity.